Poems (Y) Part I

Okay, so I have two poems, I'll go in chronological order, so they aren't *perfect* but they'll do for now.

With the first beads of blood,
The first broken skin,
Like a sinister requiem entwined in sin,

Caught in the midst of a lethal masquerade
A release from the anguish of putting on this façade

How many times, have I played this game?
Of spiritual torture, my answer still the same
This unnatural addiction
A sole communication to the man who isn't there
Full on the outside, so everyone can stare

Living like a shadow, held in repugnance
Like a demon in its stance
Liar and a fake,
Crying for pity, lying through my teeth

I seethe words of "Pay me no attention --
Not even like you care."

Naught but malediction flows through these malignant veins
Pouncing like a lion, preying like a wraith
Only just a bane

Flowing out a river of crimson
A lake jealousy
A pond of pain

Moving back into the midst
Like a ripper of self-pain.