My new songs/poems

My first proper song in God knows how long...

It's called Babylone, for obvious reasons!

In my mind, I see the ruins
Of an era of the past
I hear the rumbling of a din
From an age gone by.

I bet when you saw,
The future from way back then,
You'd never realise,
Not for one second

It'd be in ruins in a year.

When I look back,
I see with hindsight,
Things were never meant to be.

The battlements of a castle,
Those were our pride,
Slowly, slowly, they've come
To be the ruins of us,

A friendship built from sadness.

I bet when you saw,
The future from way back then,
You'd never realise,
Not for one second,

It'd be in ruins in a year.

Maybe it's better, the vultures,
Perched on our souls, picking
At the flesh of our mind.

If they can salvage anything,
It's better that way.

It's sad, isn't it? That a city must be
Completely destroyed. But I've entrusted,
Myself to the flow of time.

Goodbye, I'll leave this to be
A Babel of the modern day.
I'll leave it to become beautiful,
In a rather stark way.

I bet when you saw,
The future from way back then,
You'd never realise,
Not for once second,

It'd be in ruins in a year.

---
XX
(Poem)

To you, who I love: Sayounara
To you, who I crave: Arigatou
To you, who I miss: Suimasen

Good bye to my love, the most enduring ache.
Thank you for our moments. The ones we had, and those we never will.
I apologise to you, for every stinging word, you took with so much grace.

You will forever me my greatest love, and my greatest lament.
Even though our love was a rose that rots and never blooms.
The love I had, it made me stronger that I'd ever been before.

Forever it will be, my most precious thing.

So from this moment, we will walk apart.
Our backs together, my head held high.
The scar within my heart, is finally free to heal.

---
Windows

In front of my face
A door slams shut
Behind me, I hear the door
To a future creak, open, open.

In my bones, I feel it,
The anticipation, it's killing,
It's killing me.

Down my skin, it strikes,
Like an evil mist, I'm paralysed
Paralysed from head to toe.

When did I last fear? When was
Failure ever this close to joy?

The door jammed shut.
I cannot go back,
My only wish is for you to,
To, please hold my hand?

---
Liar

When I realised, the songs I heard,
They were all sung about you, for you.
When I realised, all the poems I wrote,
It all described you, your memory.

I want to break it all, rip it all to shreds.

When I realised, the anger I had towards myself,
It was all aimed at you, but I could never be angry to you.
When I realised, all my melancholy days,
They were all because of you, even though I could never blame you.

I want to stop it all, I'd rather never feel again.

If I realise I'm thinking of you,
Should I be happy or sad?

I'd like to remember your scent,
And smile with fondess it once filled my air.
I'd like to remember your taste,
Which once lingered on my lips.

I wish I could breathe out the fragrance.

I want to spit out your taste.

I want to wish for your happiness,
But I want it to never last.

I want to break it all, rip it all to shreds.

I want to stop it all, I'd rather never feel again.

I wish I could breathe out the fragrance.

I want to spit out your taste.

You were never mine.
But I was always yours.

I cannot be happy for the two of us.
And for that I'm truly sorry.

---

I'm really unhappy with it.
Oh well, there's also a new poem in my MySpace blog, and an even newer poem on AHS. :)

Exams are over, I'm really happy. I've not blogged in so long.

Since I last blogs, friendships have bloomed, friendships have wilted. I'm happy have the first, at most indifferent at the last. People going doesn't impact me, people coming does.

Get my exam results in August! Good luck to EVERYONE I know. Even if I dislike you. :)

College in September? I hope so. I'm a little sad at the minute. But all it going well for me.

I love life at the minute, really. :)

My future...heck...I HAVE a future. Uh...I'd like to give a special thanks to HANNAH for being on MSN to give me various information about exams and school.
A thanks to LAURA for just being Laura.
A thanks to SARAH for being there for me through everything*
A thanks to JESS for being JESS too. Which means I have to make her read this. ;D
Too bad Jess, too bad. :D

Er...I'm currently really liking enka. Someone from AHS uploaded a Misora Hibari album for me! So I'm in love!

Currently, I'm rereading Mineko Iwasaki's autobiography.

*Sarah! Thank you for sending me cool stuff again. We're definitely sending off your package when my dad gets his wage! :)
Sorry for the tremendous lag. She sent me: Animal Crackers, spiced cider mix, pomegranate fragranced conditioner (which is lovely by the way), and a suede pouch! Thank you for that~!

So...that's it for now. A rather rushed update! Baibai!