Saturday 2 January 2010

The Opening of a New Year

We've survived another year and more importantly another decade.
I've thought long and hard about myself, who I am, what I need to do and I've still not come to clear conclusions. The only thing I've realized is that it's fruitless to carry on traditions that never worked in the past. I won't promise myself things I can't achieve. I won't promise my friends things I can't give.
This year, 2010, it's time for me to be completely honest with myself.

Honestly, what I want the most from this year is the happiness of my friends. Last year I joined a forum and since joining I've met so many great people who I've come to be friends with, who I've come to trust. It's crazy how quickly people gain your confidence and love, isn't it?
But I digress. This happiness I'm wishing isn't just for my friends. I've been friends with people I've hurt in ways I'll never do again. I've been friends with people who've hurt me in a way I'll never allow again. But even then, I'm wishing for a future not where I can join these people again in friendship, but one without conflict. I have a good feeling from this year and I'll do my utmost to help.

2009 was a terrible year for me, there's no denying it but I'm not the Joel from January 2009, I'm not the Joel from March 2009, I'm not even the Joel from December 2009. Being human means we have to change for better, or for worse.

I'm going to keep changing, and so are my friends. Who knows what this year will hold. I know for a fact it won't be easy. I know for a fact there'll be times we want to give up. I know for a fact there'll be times when we're hurt. I know for a fact there's always a tomorrow.

I'm not wanting you to quit smoking. I'm not wanting you to lose 5 lbs, I'm not wanting you to start working out.
All I want is for you to be happy. All I want is for you to be true to yourself, that's all that's important. You can lie to me, but as long as you know the truth then I don't care.

Here's to not a year free from pain, but a year filled with happiness.

I love you all! Thanks for reading such a random blog.