Figured I should blog, 'cause it's fucking freezing .
But yeah looking down my blog, it's like...UNFINISHED, FINISH LATER...and so on. Knowing I will never finish them, I should delete them, probably won't though.
Oh well! :D
But yeah! I'm fucking cold, the heating is on, whoa winter is coming!
I'm already getting bored. Lol.
But yeah, slightly less cold :D after explaining DIV layouts (H)
mmmhm yeah so school sucks, but it's good to get back into the fray lol, coincidently I should probably be doing coursework..oh well :D
But yeah :D
Peace love cookies and I can't be fucked.. ROFL LOVE :D
OH YEAH! Check out GLASS SKIN - Dir en grey :D
Tuesday 28 October 2008
Monday 13 October 2008
to be finished.
So...not blogged for a long, long while. But I'll probably rely on blogging way more nowadays.
It's kinda upsetting when..someone you've liked for a good while..(5 years this year..lol) turns round and basically says 'yeah I do wanna see what it's like' then 3 weeks later tells you to fuck off cause you don't understand.
Which if it hasn't hurt me it's pissed me off...why do people think that I don't understand what it is to do well? I understand that more than a lot of people to be honest. I've fucked up, so isn't doing well important? I wanna teach so I have to do well. I wanna teach abroad so I have to do extra-well.
Oh man. Whatever. Sleep! Sleep is amazing, but lately I just don't seem to be getting enough of it. I mean, all I wanna do is sleep, it's all that occupies my mind, when I get home from school today, I wanna just sleep and sleep and sleep.
I don't really know what went wrong! I used to never sleep, not feel the consequences...now I never sleep and even when I sleep I'm sluggish and withdrawn.
Last night I had at least a basic outline about what I was gonna put, but now I'm not so sure. Bah. I'll finish it after school. lol
It's kinda upsetting when..someone you've liked for a good while..(5 years this year..lol) turns round and basically says 'yeah I do wanna see what it's like' then 3 weeks later tells you to fuck off cause you don't understand.
Which if it hasn't hurt me it's pissed me off...why do people think that I don't understand what it is to do well? I understand that more than a lot of people to be honest. I've fucked up, so isn't doing well important? I wanna teach so I have to do well. I wanna teach abroad so I have to do extra-well.
Oh man. Whatever. Sleep! Sleep is amazing, but lately I just don't seem to be getting enough of it. I mean, all I wanna do is sleep, it's all that occupies my mind, when I get home from school today, I wanna just sleep and sleep and sleep.
I don't really know what went wrong! I used to never sleep, not feel the consequences...now I never sleep and even when I sleep I'm sluggish and withdrawn.
Last night I had at least a basic outline about what I was gonna put, but now I'm not so sure. Bah. I'll finish it after school. lol
Saturday 4 October 2008
Politics
Social politics are undoubtedly the most important aspect of life, sure you can gloss over and say it's not important, but it plays a vital role in my life.
If someone smiled at me, I'd be obliged to smile back.
If I bumped into someone, I apologise when it's not my fault.
I try to keep a conversation flowing by being random, but it's not working too well.
Of course, think of me as fake, but I'm not actually fake. If you think about it deeply, you'll notice it's impossible to treat everyone the same way, that's just common sense.
This past year has been the worst, unmatched. But my life is crawling up slowly, so slow in fact it's dragging. But if you think about it, my life isn't so bad. I have parents who love me, a sister who is there for me and a brother who cares (in his own way), I also have good friends and other stuff.
But you could ask, what has this to do with social politics! Well...a lot actually, for too long, I've tried to be a good person, and failed miserably. A lot of my friends now, i.e. people I'm close with, in a fashion are all my friends due to these politics.
The people who I care about and shower my time on I care about. You can usually know I care about you by the amount of time I spend on you. There's some of you who I'd be with all day if I could.
But yeah so this year I've messed up, but I'm dedicated to making amends. I'm not the sort of person to break down and apologise to people, I can't do that, but I will always try and return the kindness of people.
A lot of people seem to think that I'm not a kind person, when if I look at myself...I'm not really unkind. I am selfish, I admit, but I am kind too.
As everyone knows, I'm not the most grounded person, I get low easily, quickly and often. When I'm happy, I'm ecstatic. When I'm sad I range from sombre to...well, I won't get into that. At the minute, I'm pretty sombre, I can laugh and joke when in this mood, I can be slightly happy in this mood too, which is a paradox in itself, but I don't pretend to be simple.
The world, sadly, isn't an ideal place. An ideal place for me would be somewhere idyllic, quiet, mountainous land where only people I like are alive...nice :)
ROFL
But this isn't my ideal world, there's no guarantee that anyone I fall in love with will love me back, I'm always gonna have ups and downs, I know this, I just gotta control the downs...lol ah that was a bitter realisation, sorry for the abundance of emoness!
Peace! x
If someone smiled at me, I'd be obliged to smile back.
If I bumped into someone, I apologise when it's not my fault.
I try to keep a conversation flowing by being random, but it's not working too well.
Of course, think of me as fake, but I'm not actually fake. If you think about it deeply, you'll notice it's impossible to treat everyone the same way, that's just common sense.
This past year has been the worst, unmatched. But my life is crawling up slowly, so slow in fact it's dragging. But if you think about it, my life isn't so bad. I have parents who love me, a sister who is there for me and a brother who cares (in his own way), I also have good friends and other stuff.
But you could ask, what has this to do with social politics! Well...a lot actually, for too long, I've tried to be a good person, and failed miserably. A lot of my friends now, i.e. people I'm close with, in a fashion are all my friends due to these politics.
The people who I care about and shower my time on I care about. You can usually know I care about you by the amount of time I spend on you. There's some of you who I'd be with all day if I could.
But yeah so this year I've messed up, but I'm dedicated to making amends. I'm not the sort of person to break down and apologise to people, I can't do that, but I will always try and return the kindness of people.
A lot of people seem to think that I'm not a kind person, when if I look at myself...I'm not really unkind. I am selfish, I admit, but I am kind too.
As everyone knows, I'm not the most grounded person, I get low easily, quickly and often. When I'm happy, I'm ecstatic. When I'm sad I range from sombre to...well, I won't get into that. At the minute, I'm pretty sombre, I can laugh and joke when in this mood, I can be slightly happy in this mood too, which is a paradox in itself, but I don't pretend to be simple.
The world, sadly, isn't an ideal place. An ideal place for me would be somewhere idyllic, quiet, mountainous land where only people I like are alive...nice :)
ROFL
But this isn't my ideal world, there's no guarantee that anyone I fall in love with will love me back, I'm always gonna have ups and downs, I know this, I just gotta control the downs...lol ah that was a bitter realisation, sorry for the abundance of emoness!
Peace! x
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